Right, so you can choose an outfit and figure out what kind of soda to offer, whether to use iambic pentameter or perhaps haiku, etc. you mentioned that.
Here’s how it could go:
Steve: Hey Bob, I just heard you’re working on a flux capacitor. That’s really cool, I’m more of a warp core guy but I read an article on the holonet about that last week. How’s that project going?
Bob: It’s real tough, we gotta feed this 1.21 giga watts of electricity so I’m working on a Tesla coil to power it.
Steve: Oh no way, you know, I actually just built one last month on another project, I’ve never worked on a flux capacitor before but I can help you with the Tesla coil if you want.
Bob: Oh yeah sure thanks that’s real helpful. I’m just getting started so it’s still in planning phases but I’ll come grab you in a bit.
Steve: Awesome! Mind if I watch you work a bit? I’ll stay out of your way since I can’t add much value, I just like watching people who are good at what they do while they practice their craft. And it’ll help me if I ever encounter this in the future
Bob: Oh you know actually I’m sorta uncomfortable with that, makes me feel on the spot. How about I show you when it’s done? I’m happy to go over the designs and final product and stuff when I have something to show for it.
Steve: Sure great awesome that works! Doesn’t have to be anything formal, just a quick rundown of the basics and maybe how you resolved some technical issues with creative workarounds, stuff like that. You can wear whatever you want, don’t need to dress up fancy for me. You don’t have to feed me or offer drinks or anything either, super chill, just a few minutes to skim over your work.
Bob: Cool man, that works, any time. By the way, how’s that warp nacelle coming alone? I hear the Heisenberg compensator is acting up again.
Steve: Yeah it’s being a little bitch but I’ll show you once it’s done. Everyone wins!
See that’s how it could go if you weren’t a toxic antisocial insane person. Just talk to colleagues about projects, learn, share, collaborate. But instead you drop thousands of words of toxic vitriol overthinking the shit out of it. Going from shooting the breeze with colleagues to planning month long lesson plans and Ted talks down to what outfit you’re gonna where, what accent to use (?), something about perfume…seriously man, get thee to a therapist and eat a Xanax, please l. You’re in dire need.