We're taught that women send signals to show if she desires or wants someone or not, but many of these signals are very subtle
The only signal I consider to be valid is consent for sex. Some women give out numbers, but they have no intention of meeting up. Some women go on dates for free food. Subtle flirting signals don't mean anything nowadays.
the original poster thinks that men get angry at women because they're allowed to be sexy and feel desirable in ways that men aren't.
The only signal I consider to be valid is consent for sex
Yup, and I'd also add if you're out her doing say cold approaches, then reading signals also applies here as well. Other than that, if we're talking about women showing interest, she needs to use their words cuz chances are, I may not even notice her if she's sending them, making me more likely to go for someone I am attracted to. It's only natural.
That is nonsense
Yea sometimes I get the feeling when they talk about men's issues, it's done in a way it talks about men's toxic behaviour being cause by not being more like women or some shit like that
Signals are often intentionally subtle and ambiguous, because it affords them plausible deniability, and is not as risky. It is up to us to not be fazed by that, and to go ahead until met with resistance. Unfortunately this leads to many gentler guys not making a move, and to others crossing boundaries...
100% agree with this. I have a personal qualifier. Whenever I talk to a woman and I get body language signals that indicate she doesn't want to talk to me or isn't interested in this conversation, or maybe she's just shy. What I would do is bring up the matter in an empathetic way and basically verbally gauge if she wants to talk or not. Now we're not entitled to a response to any question we ask and that's totally fine, but I believe approaching it this way qualifies women who verbalize their comfort with us rather than expecting us to read into the situation. So if she doesn't respond to that question the minute we bring it up, that tells us what we need to know about her communication style, and whether we as men want to engage with that or not.
As for the gentler guy situation, I written a recent article with solutions that I believe would help the gentler guy out. Lemme know what you think.
"The paradox of tolerance states that if a society is tolerant without limit, its ability to be tolerant is eventually seized or destroyed by the intolerant. Karl Popper described it as the seemingly self-contradictory idea that in order to maintain a tolerant society, the society must retain the right to be intolerant of intolerance." - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paradox_of_tolerance
I for one welcome our intolerant of intolerance server admins across the fediverse.
I get why you're posting this comic and I contextually agree with you. However, the comic itself is bad, and it distorts quite a bit what Popper said.
The quote in the Wikipedia link that you've shared is considerably better:
Less well known [than other paradoxes] is the paradox of tolerance: Unlimited tolerance must lead to the disappearance of tolerance. If we extend unlimited tolerance even to those who are intolerant, if we are not prepared to defend a tolerant society against the onslaught of the intolerant, then the tolerant will be destroyed, and tolerance with them.—In this formulation, I do not imply, for instance, that we should always suppress the utterance of intolerant philosophies; as long as we can counter them by rational argument and keep them in check by public opinion, suppression would certainly be most unwise. But we should claim the right to suppress them if necessary even by force; for it may easily turn out that they are not prepared to meet us on the level of rational argument, but begin by denouncing all argument; they may forbid their followers to listen to rational argument, because it is deceptive, and teach them to answer arguments by the use of their fists or pistols. We should therefore claim, in the name of tolerance, the right not to tolerate the intolerant. We should claim that any movement preaching intolerance places itself outside the law and we should consider incitement to intolerance and persecution as criminal, in the same way as we should consider incitement to murder, or to kidnapping, or to the revival of the slave trade, as criminal.
Sorry, but what comic are you referring to? Some other users also referenced panels of a comic, but I don’t see any comic—or any link other than to Wikipedia.
Either it was edited in and that edit didn't reach your instance, or Lemmy doesn't like something about how Kbin does images. Either way, here's a direct link to the comic (you'll have seen it before, it's posted a lot).
Annoyingly, I can’t view the post from its own instance because it seems like Kbin requires an account even to view?
Would love if someone has a Lemmy link to any instance other than mine so I can rule out that first possibility.
or Lemmy doesn’t like something about how Kbin does images
This is definitely very possible. I’ve already encountered cases where Kbin users weren’t able to interact with my images from Lemmy in quite the same way Lemmy users could.
Interesting that the image doesn’t show up embedded even in another Kbin instance. @Otome-chan you seemed to have some knowledge, do you know what’s up?
this partisan nonsense is the biggest threat to the fediverse rn. when will people understand that the real fight is down vs. up, the little guy vs the elite mafia. left/right as an endless blamegame they use to keep us fighting each other, while they steal from everyone. the old divide & conquer, still works like charm. every other platform is already infected with it. if it gets to the fediverse, we're just gonna end up with a bunch of oppressive echo chambers much like reddit. if that happens I'll be gone
You're implying that the left and right suppress each other equally, but frankly it's only the right trying to fuck over their fellow man for profit and power. Got nothing to do with being more enlightened or smarter. Compassion though... Ye, the left are more compassionate.
Lets just take this to the extreme and see where shit lands.
Take the common leftist view. What happens to the country if we "got" our way. Everyone has healthcare coverage. Everyone with regard to their gender, orientation, race are treated equally and with dignity/respect. Everyone has a living wage. Everyone that wants to go to college can go to college without huge debt. Oh, we have to figure out how to pay for it.
Man that sounds fucking awful.
Now take it where the common right wing idiot that is consumed by the culture war wants to take it. Gay marriage outlawed. Transpeople wiped from the face of the earth. Fuck minorities. No minimum wage. Lower taxes for the 1%. Privatized social security, privatized medicare. No federal minimum wage. Gov't restriction of free speech.
And yes, I say right wing dipshits want to restrict free speech because they are the morons removing books. To quote Rage Against the Machine, "They don't have to burn the books, they just remove them" That is exactly what the right wing morons are doing.
The right getting their way leads to a dystopian shithole where only the wealthy have decent lives.
I would actually be ok arguing economics with a conservative. But the conservatives lost that fight when they embraced the religious right and decided to economically spend just as much as the liberals. Both parties are big spenders. So economics aren't a talking point anymore. It is purely a culture war that the right started.
Definitely smarter than the group that thinks Trump should be a president and tries to deny science at every turn. You don't need me to tell you which group it is that denied global warming, denied the existence of covid-19, denied universal healthcare, host the Nazis and white supremacists, and so on, do you?
And when confronted with these kinds of questions the typical reaction is to ignore it or make excuses rather than looking at their own group with insight. Any conservatives who think it's okay for Nazis and extremists to house themselves in their group might as well join them. Otherwise, stop making excuses and look at the problems.
it's important to see that both sides have extremes and to assume that anyone who tips the scale "left" or "right" is somehow more right or more wrong is what keeps us from being able to find common ground. turning the words "conservative" and "liberal" into slurs is equally damaging. we both have ways of lashing out at each other when we are not the enemy. I bet we can agree that extremism is dangerous regardless of which side of the fence it resides on.
frankly I'm a little concerned by it. I want my opinions to be valued if I'm going to share them. frankly I already don't feel welcome and this is literally day two and not even a political /m/.
I always love it when people reduce debates around whether the public existence of LGBT people is actually pedophilia or whether Black people being routinely murdered by police is an actual problem to being nothing more than a mere distraction against the Real Fight against the evil elite lizard people.
Listen, it's cool that these are the kinds of issues that obviously don't affect you or the people around you. But not everyone actually agrees that literally every issue ever can be reduced to being a sideshow of a greater class-based conflict. Do you not see how deeply patronizing it is to be told that the debates about your core identity are meaningless distractions that we need to stop talking about? I can see it being easy to believe that if your core identity isn't routinely made to be a political issue that can be debated, but not all of us are so lucky.
But we have out fair share of Mao and Stalin lovers and Xi loveboys. It’s very simmilar. But I guess they are mostly contained to one or two instances.
I really liked /r/latestagecapitalism but I got banned for talking smack about China, and how the authoritarianism of the USSR and its child states didn't line up with the values they tried to espouse.
Permanently banned. Appeal ignored. Disappointing, but good riddance I suppose.
Why does anyone need a 'men's space'? I'm a man but I just would not be interested in that specifically. This is the Internet and there's a space for everything specifically. Sounds like a 'men's space' or a 'women's space' are bound to be filled with intolerance for the other genders.
Sometimes people want to talk about their shit with people who can directly relate to it, and would prefer if people who can't relate aren't invited to the conversation.
I'm a man but I just would not be interested in that specifically.
There is a gap between "I'm not interested" and "I refuse to understand why someone else would be interested" that's not really acknowledged here but is important to be able to engage with.
I don't disagree that gendered spaces are primed to end up displaying a modicum of prejudice against the other, but I don't agree that this must necessarily be the case.
There are genuine issues facing men that I think we should be allowed and even encouraged to discuss, and I think it's important that such conversations are had with other men in particular to reduce the stigma surrounding them. So in my mind the goal of such a space isn't to discourage women from participating, but localizing the discussion so that it's easier for men to find.
The unfortunate truth is that too many men these days seem to think feminism is out to oppress them, which simply isn't the case.
Everything at reddit devolved into pushing political ideals. That's what happens when nobody can respect that others are allowed to have different opinions.
So 'people who respect other people's opinions' are nazis?
EDIT: The amount of stuff you have to assume, lie about, and make-up is astounding. I pity you. You're making up your own enemy and that's very sad. I hope one day you can have a productive discussion without villifying anyone who dares simply say they have a different opinion than you.
It's clear that you don't even understand the 'paradox of intolerance' that you like to misquote.
Just an FYI, OnlyFans (or any other business) could easily start a kbin, mastodon, pixelfed instance and call it kbin.OnlyFans.net or OnlyFans.social, or what ever they choose.
If Reddit can bot comments then Reddit can also bot moderators. Come on, don't be lazy Reddit! Show us your leadership capabilities and come up with a solution!
"How to sabotage your community: 101"
Red Hat is taking notes.
The person speaking was Laura Nestler, here is her bio from REddit:
Laura Nestler, Reddit's VP of Community, is a global leader with a 15-year track record of building strategic, high-impact teams and scalable community systems at growth-stage startups. Nestler leads Reddit’s Community Operations team where she is responsible for defining our international community strategy, driving key initiatives for community development, evolving Reddit’s community governance model, and transitioning the team into a global organization. Prior to Reddit, she served as Global Head of Community at Duolingo, working across product, marketing, and strategy to develop community products and programs.
She is a global leader, guys, with high-impact teams! She will solve the crisis in no time, you'll see! Is there anyone among you who can claim to be a "global leader" ? No one?
Clarence Thomas is one of the more startling examples of the "fuck you, I got mine" generation. How do you go from being in the black panthers to this?
I love this, as soon as the black guy makes an opinion that differs from what you liberals agree he's suddenly not a good black dude, what a bunch of hypocrites
If you intentionally choose to completely misinterpret and misrepresent things then fuck off buddy, on the other hand if you truly can't see then I feel sorry for you friend...
Let's face it, they already had it on some of the big default subs as well.
I went though a phase of bot hunting, and it was not unusual to find comment chains of 3 bots replying to each other near the top of big threads, sometimes with a hapless human or two in the mix.
They use snippets of comments from downthread (and usually downvote their "donor" comments to lower visibility) so it seems kind of organic. Sometimes they use a thesaurus or something and re word it somewhat.
What was really sad was when you'd see a human writing screeds of long arguments in reply to them.
Excuse my ignorance, but how were you able to recognize the bots?
The repost bots were fairly easy to spot, but I sadly never found a situation like the one you're describing. I don't use reddit anymore, but the information may be useful elsewhere.
It's a bit like finding a single thread and unravelling it.
I used to get dozens of these things banned a day, there were a lot of us bot hunters reporting bots.
They sometimes sound "off", stop in mid sentence, reply to people as if they think it's the OP, reply as if they are OP, or post 💯 by itself. Or they have a username that fits a recent bot pattern (e.g. appending "rp" to existing usernames)
.
If you see one slip up once, then looking at its other comments will often lead you to new bots simply because they are all attracted to the same positions (prominent but a few comments deep).
Certain subs like AITA and r/memes are more prone to them so I would go there for easy leads.
Also if you check its actual submissions, a karma laden bot will often repost hobby content, then have a second bot come and claim to have bought a t shirt or mug with that content and post a malicious link. Then a third bot will pose as another redditor saying thanks I just ordered one to the second bot. Following those bots leads you to even more bots, etc.
To add to what other people said: As a casual user who didn't go deliberately looking for bots, I mostly caught them when they posted a comment that was a complete non sequitur to the comment they replied to, like they were posted in the wrong thread. Which, well, is because they were--they were copied from elsewhere in the comment section and randomly posted as a reply to a more prominent thread. Ctrl+F came in very handy there. (They do sometimes reword things, but generally only a couple of words, so searching for bits and pieces of their comment still usually turns up results.)
Also, the bot comments I caught were usually just a line or two, not entire paragraphs, even if they were copied from a longer comment.
The past year or so, they've been in every single thread with more than 50 comments. If you expand the comments and do a little ctrl+f searching, you'll see how they copy comments from users and then repost and have their fellow bots upvote them for visibility. Look at the timestamps on the posts.
SubredditSimulator was based on older generative algorithms, so everyone could fairly easily tell that it was rubbish. When SubredditSimulator got shut down, someone made a new one based on GPT-2 (I think) and everyone was like "OK, this is getting harder to distinguish from real people".
I'm betting someone has made even more advanced bots by now. I'm betting someone's also not concerned about telling other users upfront that they're bots, and they're not confining them into specific subs. Now, the only reason I'm not accusing Reddit Inc themselves of building these bots is that they aren't exactly a bastion of software engineering excellence; the site barely works as is.
Instances exist for more than just to access singular communities. You can access our stuff here, and we will go to y'all as well. This is no small community either. We choose to be on kbin for a reason.
I wasn't basing an argument around him but the hypocrisy that we want men to be emotionally vulnerable, until they have politics we don't like the it is fuck them.
That is what I was highlighting, not that I like Jordan Peterson, as I hate his politics, but If you want men to be vulnerable, it can't be just men who align with what the left inherently agrees with. It has to be extended to everyone
I'm going to suggest one I'm not seeing here; OpenSUSE Tumbleweed. I cut my teeth on Tumbleweed for years, and it has the pros of a rolling release while YaST provides the tools needed to have a stable base that rivals that of Ubuntu. Gaming is extremely easy to get set up, and you can choose pretty much any major desktop, although I recommend XFCE.
Linux Mint is perfect! Avoid Ubuntu, which has a very shady history... Despite Mint being based on Ubuntu/Debian, it doesn't have any spying software. Like Ubuntu used to send all the search queries to Ubuntu when you were searching locally on your system for a file or an image.
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